The words ‘Rest in peace’ are echoing through my heart because throughout your life, that is all you were seeking: peace. Living in the spotlight and filling, even surpassing the shoes of your mother godmother cousin and family, you broke the mold that was set by so many greats. I remember when I first heard and understood your voice and it changed my idea of music. I heard her hit notes and come out of those notes so effortlessly and I was changed. I was in the womb listening to you so I can assume that that is what drew me to your voice. When I was 5 years old singing saving all my love by heart. My mom used to have ‘It’s not right but it’s okay’ on cassette. On side A it was the original track and on side B there was the reggae mix where you hold that ‘you were making a fool of me’ line extra long and I would belt it out from the back seat. I remember my dad used to let me go on charters with him (he’s a bus driver) and I would get paid to sing Whitney songs to the passengers. They would tip me and I like to think of it as my first singing gig. lol. I think I wrote every music report I had on you because I wanted the world to understand why I loved you so much. When I saw you in Waiting to Exhale and I heard the hit single ‘Shoop Shoop’ I knew there was nothing you couldn’t do. Then when I saw the Preacher’s Wife and I heard you sing ‘I Love the Lord’ and ‘Who Would Imagine a King’ I melted. Then the Bodyguard came out and I made a vow that no other female artist would be above you. That was when life was simple. I sang because I loved to sing, I listened to you and I didn’t have to worry about anything else. Then when I got older I watched you start to wither away until you disappeared. I left you to live and I was surviving off the trail of great music you left behind. Then you returned and I was so elated. I bought the cd and blasted it happily because it was Whitney. Then you left again. I waited and watched the media talk about your roller coaster personal life. I waited for the voice to come back and silence the naysayers but it never came back. You made another come back after you cleaned up your life and I loved your two hits going back to your gospel roots but the audio did not match the live performance. I recorded the episode of Oprah with you on it just so I could hear you and you were not even singing you let me down. I watched as the news and the public tore you apart for letting drugs take your voice and I couldn’t help but agree. You were my hero, my idol, my inspiration. Now you are gone and I cry for the woman that the public never seen. The woman who was living in the public eye who just wanted peace who just wanted a break. I grew up idolizing you, I love and respect music today because of you and I mourn the loss of you because you truly are a major part of my life. I hope you get the peace you were so desperately seeking. Rest in peace my idol, my inspiration, Whitney Houston. <3